Before I go onto my next boyfriend, I added a couple of 30 second boys on my playlist through my on and off stage with Toby too cool. I felt I should touch on these because even though they didn't amount to much, I still learned some good lessons.
After my high school graduation, I went to a house party with some friends and I ran into a hottie basketball player from another school. We will call him "too fast Jack." We talked for a while throughout the night, and let me tell you, I was definitely infatuated. A really bad fight broke out which ended the party very quickly and we left before too fast Jack could get my number. I was pretty bummed because he was just too darn cute. Little did I know that he would track me down through the Mormon church (red flag #1). He was a Mormon boy, and I am what you call a jack mormon. Mormons are VERY good at keeping track of each other and there is always a phone list kept with whatever ward you are in. Some how he learned my last name and started up the Mormon calling tree. Pretty soon my phone rang and it was Jack. At the time I was so honored and excited that he had done so much to track me down, but now...not so much. We went out on our first date and the whole time I just couldn't stop staring at him. The conversation was just so-so, no real spark was there but the attraction overtook the intellectual connection so I of course kept dating him. The convos started off like normal. We had the usual first date talks, but soon more red flags started to pop up. He would through in an "us having kids together" comment here, an "us getting married comment" there. I just kind of laughed it off, totally thought he was joking and never took him seriously because we were so young. Then, after A WEEK of dating, he sat me down and told me that he has it all planned out. He would go on his mission and when he gets back we would move to Utah together, get married and go to BYU. In that moment it finally clicked, I wanted to get up and run away from him. This whole time I had been too infatuated with him to really realize what had been going through his head. I was too scared to tell him how I really felt though so I humored him that night and avoided him as soon as I got out of his car. I know, it was very rude of me. I should have been open and honest but I was young and still learning.
A few weeks later I met a new 30 second boy. We shall call him "I don't know why Ty." I honestly don't know why I dated him. Actually, I didn't really date him. I met him at a party, he got my number and a couple days later we went out on a date. Nothing was there between us so once again I avoided him. He was a persistent one. He showed up at my house one day, thank goodness my sister answered the door and told him I wasn't there, and he gave my sister 5 wallet sized photos of himself to give to me. He even signed the back of one of them and left his phone number. Oh Ty, I really don't know why.
I really should have just been honest with the both of them because karma came back and bit me. It ended up that "too fast Jack" and "I don't know why Ty," had gone to the same high school and were friends. I found this out the hard way. My friends and I went to another house party where I ran into Ty, always one of those awkward moments when you run into someone you were avoiding. We chatted for a minute and then Jack walks up and puts his arm around Ty. Ty asked how Jack knew me and told him that we went out on a date together, little did I know that Jack is the jealous type. He gets mad, starts yelling at Jack and tries to start a fight. Luckily I was able to slip out of the house and leave during all of this commotion. Jack and Ty soon made up though and decided to team up and get back at me. I had recently gotten back together with "Toby too cool" and we were returning home one night to find Ty and Jack toilet papering my house. They ended up running in the opposite direction of their car, which they had left running just incase they needed a quick getaway. Toby was not happy so he walked up to their car, took the keys, threw them in the backseat and locked all the doors. I still don't know how they got home that night.
Moral of the story: Don't let infatuation get the best of you. Be smart about your choices. Honesty really is the best policy and don't date friends of friends or they will come toilet paper your house.
My love, my life, my rock.
Friday, March 11, 2011
Friday, March 4, 2011
"That boy there, well he's playing a fool. He thinks he's funny and he thinks he's cool"
I've been going through some old pictures the past couple days which brought back many memories of my amazing dating life. I am now feeling the need to reflect a little on my past relationships/dating mishaps and the lessons I've learned from them. My next few posts will be about the lucky men in the playlist of my past. I will be changing the names of the lucky men BUT, if I have a picture of them, I will be sure to add it onto my post! lol
First man to walk off the plank, whom we shall call "Toby too cool," was my first "love." Or so I thought at the time. I remember the first time I saw him in the high school lunch room. I was a freshman, he was a junior, and for some odd reason I thought he was the cutest boy in the school. He was kind of a scrawny little feller, with BLEACHED blonde hair. Yes, I did just say bleached. The sides of his hair was shaved and dark brown, and the top of his hair was long and blonde. Talk about HOTTT(insert sarcasm)! I admired him from afar for a couple days but was soon approached by a mutual friend of ours. This friend informed me that Toby thinks I am pretty and would like to meet me. So the next day, in the magical high school lunch room, this friend introduced me and Toby. From that day on Toby and I were inseparable.
I definitely lost the balance in my life. I didn't see my friends as much anymore, I was choosing to go to the golf course to watch him play rather than spend time with my family. I basically worshiped the ground he walked on. I have proceeded to think that way with a lot of my boyfriends since, but I will get into that later.
Things were perfect. We would go to lunch together everyday, spend the weekends together, see each other after school, there pretty much wasn't a moment that we weren't together. Then, 2 months into our relationship, he said those three words that every girl loves to hear "I love you." Although, I wasn't one of those girls that couldn't wait to hear those words. In fact, the minute he said I love you, my life turned upside down. I didn't know what love was or even how it felt! I gave in of course and said it back, but for weeks I questioned it. I even pulled out the dictionary and showed it to Toby too cool! I know, I'm a nerd. I just wasn't feeling this emotion back at all but the more I said it, the more I started to believe the words that were coming out of my mouth.
We dated on and off for 4 1/2 years, it was ridiculous. He at one point told me that since he got me as his girlfriend, he felt that he could get any girl so he wanted to play the field. Yep, he said that and I took him back. Boy was I naive. After those lovely 4 1/2 years, I finally built up enough courage and broke it off. It didn't end there of course. (He actually makes appearances throughout my life but I will get to that later.) After I ended it with Toby, he would sometimes drive by my house late at night and rev his engine just to let me know he's driving by. Talk about corny. This went on for months!!! Well, years actually. Soon I met a new boy to add to my playlist and Toby too cool did not like this. As I was saying goodbye to this new boy, whom I shall name in my next post, Toby pulled up in his dad's mini van. Toby stopped for a moment and revved the mini vans oh so loud and scary engine at us, then proceeded to get out of the van and tried to get into a fight with this new boy. Men and their peacocking...
In conclusion, you would have thought that through this relationship I would have learned a lot at that age, but honestly I was too consumed with other things and didn't really pay attention to what I was supposed take from it. As I got older and looked back on it, I started realizing a lot and finally learned my lessons. I was never IN LOVE with Toby too cool. I had just grown to love him as a friend throughout our relationship but was too scared to be true to myself and admit it. I lost myself in him and our relationship and took a lot of things for granted. Never again.
*Toby too cool's song on my playlist would be "Pretty Fly For A White Guy" by the Offspring
**Picture shall be added later! =)
First man to walk off the plank, whom we shall call "Toby too cool," was my first "love." Or so I thought at the time. I remember the first time I saw him in the high school lunch room. I was a freshman, he was a junior, and for some odd reason I thought he was the cutest boy in the school. He was kind of a scrawny little feller, with BLEACHED blonde hair. Yes, I did just say bleached. The sides of his hair was shaved and dark brown, and the top of his hair was long and blonde. Talk about HOTTT(insert sarcasm)! I admired him from afar for a couple days but was soon approached by a mutual friend of ours. This friend informed me that Toby thinks I am pretty and would like to meet me. So the next day, in the magical high school lunch room, this friend introduced me and Toby. From that day on Toby and I were inseparable.
I definitely lost the balance in my life. I didn't see my friends as much anymore, I was choosing to go to the golf course to watch him play rather than spend time with my family. I basically worshiped the ground he walked on. I have proceeded to think that way with a lot of my boyfriends since, but I will get into that later.
Things were perfect. We would go to lunch together everyday, spend the weekends together, see each other after school, there pretty much wasn't a moment that we weren't together. Then, 2 months into our relationship, he said those three words that every girl loves to hear "I love you." Although, I wasn't one of those girls that couldn't wait to hear those words. In fact, the minute he said I love you, my life turned upside down. I didn't know what love was or even how it felt! I gave in of course and said it back, but for weeks I questioned it. I even pulled out the dictionary and showed it to Toby too cool! I know, I'm a nerd. I just wasn't feeling this emotion back at all but the more I said it, the more I started to believe the words that were coming out of my mouth.
We dated on and off for 4 1/2 years, it was ridiculous. He at one point told me that since he got me as his girlfriend, he felt that he could get any girl so he wanted to play the field. Yep, he said that and I took him back. Boy was I naive. After those lovely 4 1/2 years, I finally built up enough courage and broke it off. It didn't end there of course. (He actually makes appearances throughout my life but I will get to that later.) After I ended it with Toby, he would sometimes drive by my house late at night and rev his engine just to let me know he's driving by. Talk about corny. This went on for months!!! Well, years actually. Soon I met a new boy to add to my playlist and Toby too cool did not like this. As I was saying goodbye to this new boy, whom I shall name in my next post, Toby pulled up in his dad's mini van. Toby stopped for a moment and revved the mini vans oh so loud and scary engine at us, then proceeded to get out of the van and tried to get into a fight with this new boy. Men and their peacocking...
In conclusion, you would have thought that through this relationship I would have learned a lot at that age, but honestly I was too consumed with other things and didn't really pay attention to what I was supposed take from it. As I got older and looked back on it, I started realizing a lot and finally learned my lessons. I was never IN LOVE with Toby too cool. I had just grown to love him as a friend throughout our relationship but was too scared to be true to myself and admit it. I lost myself in him and our relationship and took a lot of things for granted. Never again.
*Toby too cool's song on my playlist would be "Pretty Fly For A White Guy" by the Offspring
**Picture shall be added later! =)
Monday, February 28, 2011
"The minor fall and the major lift"
Hello hello!
My life + some wonderful/encouraging friends of mine = inspiration to start a blog about life.
I felt it appropriate to start my first post today because I sold off a minor piece of my life. It's taken me almost two years to let it go and I finally said goodbye to my wedding dress. It definitely was a bittersweet transaction. I am so thankful for the helpful hearts I have surrounding me, who gave me the inspiration to put it up for sale. I listed it on a website called preownedweddingdresses.com not even a month ago and was soon contacted. This woman had tried it on in a bridal boutique but the price was out of her budget, so she went searching on this website and found me! Needless to say, it was meant to be.
I was very sad to see it go. The transaction happened so fast, one minute it was in my hands and the next it was gone. In Jessica's words, it was like ripping off a band aid really fast. Which in a way it was. You rip the band aid off and its painless, almost numbing at first, then you start to feel a little bit of that pain but you are in acceptance of it. In a matter of seconds, I watched that time of my life walk away. I honestly wasn't sure how to react. I could say that I wish that time in my life never existed but I would be lying. The lessons I learned, from those 6 years of my life, have made me the person I am today.
I was very sad to see it go. The transaction happened so fast, one minute it was in my hands and the next it was gone. In Jessica's words, it was like ripping off a band aid really fast. Which in a way it was. You rip the band aid off and its painless, almost numbing at first, then you start to feel a little bit of that pain but you are in acceptance of it. In a matter of seconds, I watched that time of my life walk away. I honestly wasn't sure how to react. I could say that I wish that time in my life never existed but I would be lying. The lessons I learned, from those 6 years of my life, have made me the person I am today.
Even though we are only 2 months into 2011, it has already been one of my favorite/breakthrough years of my life. So many changes going on around me but also with me and I just can't wait for what's next.
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